Friday, July 18, 2014

"How to Win Friends and Influence People"

After I graduated college I used to work for a man who had an MBA from a top five school.

He was a moron.

He had employees walk off, sabotage the place, sue the company, quit and take employees and business with them.

I learned many things from him. One of the most important is that idiots hire idiots, i.e., they hire people like them. So people like him aren't just a catastrophe; they hire catastrophes, who in turn hire other catastrophes...and you get a cascade effect.

After dealing with this moron and the other morons he hired, I thought, "Well, MBAs sure don't know what they hell they're doing...does anyone?"

So I decided to read that very famous book, How to Win Friends and Influence People, and I found out why it is so famous and influential. It held a great amount of common sense.

This is from the site, How to Win Friends and Influence People in 15 Minutes.

I'm not going to post the whole thing. Each day I will post part of it.


"How to Win Friends and Influence People is one of the most popular self-improvement books ever written.

"Over 15 million copies sold and to this day people swear by the book.

"Today I present to you the How to Win Friends and Influence People summary. These are cliffnotes for each chapter within the best seller.

"But first let’s influence you on the book itself. Here are 12 things this book will do for you:

Get you out of a mental rut, give you new thoughts, new visions, new ambitions.
Enable you to make friends quickly and easily.
Increase your popularity.
Help you to win people to your way of thinking.
Increase your influence, your prestige, your ability to get things done.
Enable you to win new clients, new customers.
Increase your earning power.
Make you a better salesman, a better executive.
Help you to handle complaints, avoid arguments, keep your human contacts smooth and pleasant.
Make you a better speaker, a more entertaining conversationalist.
Make the principles of psychology easy for you to apply in your daily contacts.
Help you to arouse enthusiasm among your associates.

"I you like what you see here, I suggest you go pick up the book because there are so many useful historical examples Dale Carnegie used in his book to explain these principles in greater detail.

"So here is the summary:

Part 1: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

"Chapter 1: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

"Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself.

"Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s pride, hurts his sense of importance (everyone wants to feel important/wanted) and arouses resentment.

"Instead of condemning everyone, try to figure out why they are how they are. 'To know all is to forgive all.'

“'I will speak ill of no man… and speak all the good I know of everybody.'

"Many great leaders stood out because of this principle. Men like Abraham Lincoln ,p./made it a point at some point in his life to never criticize anyone.

Principle 1: Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.

"Chapter 2: The Big Secret of Dealing with People

"There is only one way to make someone do something, which is making them want to do it.

"The deepest craving in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.

"The best way to develop the best that is in a person is through appreciation and encouragement. – Charles Schwab

"Be anxious to praise and loath to find fault.

“'Once I did bad and that I heard ever/Twice I did good, but that I heard never.'

"Let others know you appreciate them or something about them often.

"There is a major difference between appreciation and flattery.

"Don’t just tell someone something small like 'You’re doing great' or 'Lookin good!', but tell them HOW they’re doing great, or what about them looks good, etc.

"Tell others you appreciated something they did, for example: tell a chef of some restaurant that you really enjoyed his meal. Tell a hotel manager that your room was very well kept,etc.

Principle 2: Give honest and sincere appreciation.

"Chapter 3: He Who Can do this Holds the Whole World with Him. He Who Cannot Walks a Lonely Way

"Think about things from other people’s perspective.

"Put the other person’s wants before your own.

"Convince this person of how something can benefit them.

"Arouse in the other person an eager want."

4 comments:

kurt9 said...

One of the most important is that idiots hire idiots, i.e., they hire people like them. So people like him aren't just a catastrophe; they hire catastrophes, who in turn hire other catastrophes...and you get a cascade effect.

The "Entrepreneurs Manual" (by Richard White) say that first-rate people hire first-rate people. Second-rate people hire third-rate people.

Unknown said...

And second-rate and third-rate people think they're first-rate.

Anders said...

Con men also hire second and third rate people because they are easier to keep in the dark about what is really going on with the business.

rkshanny said...

Good overall article, but no thanks for the 'advice' from the genocidal psycho Lincoln!